BAD MARRIAGE: Staying In A Unhappy MARRIAGE
How to Survive in an Unhappy Marriage and Thrive
Martha's website, "Surviving Your Split," helps readers get their confidence back after divorce. Full Bio. When you are in an unhappy marriage, you may tell yourself certain things, using them as an excuse to stay because you are scared. Such myths may include, “I have put too much time into this marriage for it to end, ” or “I. How To Survive In An Unhappy Marriage: How To Be Happy In An Unhappy Relationship. Married and feeling desperate, disappointed, discouraged and unhappy is not what most couples signed up for when they said "I do". Married and dealing with infidelity, loneliness, low self-esteem, lack of communication, disrespect. 8 Feb Let's start with the big data. How many happy marriages do you know? Fewer than 50 percent? Fewer than 30 percent? Would anyone, anyone, venture that the number might lurch beyond 50 percent? I confess that I look at these things from the outside, having thus far forgotten to get married. My number.
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Absurdly Driven looks at the world of business with a skeptical eye and a firmly rooted tongue in cheek. Fewer than 50 percent? Fewer than 30 percent? Would anyone, anyone, venture that the number might lurch beyond 50 percent?
However, it should come from the heart and not viewed to be a chore. After all, she says, "working on a relationship requires two willing participants. I try to avoid that now. By focusing on the problem, the problem grows, but when your mind shifts to the solution, anxiety and hopelessness decrease.
I confess that I look at these things from the outside, having thus far forgotten to get married. I have, though, hopeful words for those who are looking at their marriages and thinking: New research says grin and bear it.
Perhaps, more accurately, it says that if you bear it, you might end up grinning.
Here's one statistic from this research: Of those 70 percent, 68 percent claim to be happy 10 years later. Twenty-seven percent of these parents rate themselves "extremely happy," a self-description that drier sorts might find "extremely dubious.
Still, ultimate happiness is some reward for painful endurance.
It's a little like training for a marathon, suffering through it all, and discovering after 24 miles of the grueling race that you've suddenly found a second wind. Harry Benson, the research director behind the project offered this thought: Most marriages have their unhappy moments, but apart from the fortunately extremely rare cases where the relationship involves abuse, most couples can work through the difficulties to be happy later on.
Benson recommends regular date nights. But regular shouldn't mean dull or predictable. And, if you keep these date nights exciting, you'll have a 14 percent better chance of your marriage lasting.
Naturally, these statistics will offer boundless hope to many young lovers approaching Valentine's Day. They will surely feel more confident about taking the leap toward betrothal and having faith that any extreme words uttered might still have meaning in 10 years' time.
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Oh, one other small detail. This research -- which looked at data from 10, parents -- was undertaken by the Marriage Foundation.
This charitable organization "refutes and tackles the myths that persuade too many people that marriage is 'just a piece of paper' and advances the uncontroversial and positive case that the commitment inherent in getting married provides the most durable arrangement for couples and so also for their children. You're about to be redirected We notice you're visiting us from a region where we have a local version of Inc.
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You should hang in there, says science. For instance, maybe you were exhilarated by the fact that he or she was impulsive and loved to be spontaneous. If you are in an abusive relationship, these suggestions will not be enough to keep you and your kids safe.
Straight to Your Inbox. Stuck in an Unhappy Marriage? Chris Matyszczyk advises clients about advertising and marketing through his company Howard Raucous.
You should hang in there, says science. The opinions expressed here by Inc.